Saturday, September 25, 2010

Lucky Joe strikes out again

I'm a lucky guy...have a good good life...everything goes my way...except (and it is a big except) for my luck with ladies. Last night, another date, another no show..

If I had a quarter for every time I have been stood up, I could play Galaga all night long.

If I had a quarter for every time I have been stood up, I'd have $1.25. I know what you are thinking...If you only have $1.25, how in the hell are you going to be able to play galaga all night long? Answer: I'm a damn good Galaga player. Shit, does that their shine a light on my problem? Do girls keep on standing me up, due to the fact that when the plans are confirmed, I remind her to bring quarters just in case we pass by a video game arcade? I'm not sure. What I am sure of is that I am getting tired of it.

I have been stood up so many times, I just want to sit down.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

This blog has been put on probation

by the NCAA.

Lots of emails coming in asking where are you guys? Silence for a long while, what gives? You used to be so damn hard to shut up, now we can't even get a whisper out of ya.

Well, the NCAA was around these parts investigating all sorts of complayance issues. We have been given a fair punishment. But we are indeed on probation. A probation handed down by the bloody NCAA. DAMN you NCAA! Damn you to hell! (oh, they are listening?) Meant to say- Dang you NCAA! Dang you to college football heaven!

winners from last months game have been notified.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

B Smith Reports: Where Allen Bailey gets his strength from. . .

turned the kid from this...

to this.....

As an FSU fanatic it pains me to think what he might do to our beloved Christian Ponder this year.

SAW? Sports Editor
- B Smith.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Urban Files 3: In the Year One A.T.

As many of you know, we have heavy FSU representation here at the ole Short Attention What? Sports Department. Therefore, in an effort to keep things fair, we have allowed our token Gator Alum to spout his gator news (nonsense) in a weekly report called the Urban Files

First things first, FSU's New Head Coach Jimbo Fischer will not refer to Our Gators as Gators, or even as the University of Florida. No. The new Nole head man now calls us, "that little team down the road". I can do nothing but laugh at that. He just called the team who imo is the most dominant CFB Program of the last two decades, "that little team down the road." He hasn't even coached against us yet. Unbelievable. On to news and notes.

-In the Year 1 A.T. (After Tebow), our QB play will not miss a beat. The chemistry between John Brantley (seen here with his newly Kerwin Bell Inspired stache) and Deonte Thompson is like nothing we have seen before in Gainesville. Maybe its because they have risen up through the ranks together. Maybe it is because they have a unique relationship off the field. Or maybe its just because they are damn good and practice hard. Whatever the reasons, the QB to WR connection is bringing up comparisons to Manning/ Harrison!

-Demps will start at RB, Moody will back him up. Mack Brown looks good- will probably not shirt.

-DL coud be our strongest position. What i mean by that is depth and skill. We are just absolutely loaded with NFL type lineman. Everyday it's somebody else that stars.

-On the recruiting front, we picked up CB Nick Waisome. Probably the best corner in the state this year. And could have the best cover skills of any corner in the entire nation. We whiffed on RB James Wilder, Jr. But it was not quite as it seems. We wanted him as a defensive player and he wanted to play RB. IMO, we have bigger fish to fry. Not the loss some people might think.

FSU's (Editor B Smith's) Note: From now on, you will always be known as "that little team down the road" to us. Too fuckin good! Read it HERE.

Previous Urban Files:

August 1989, Iowa- Giant Arrested

Friday, August 20, 2010

Podcast Review with Katmandu 3

Every Friday, Podcast Review with Katmandu points out for you the best, most complete, fulfilling, altogether awesome, the shizzy, and other good adjective(d) podcasts of the week. Our weeks are from Friday through Thursday.

The only rules for making our lists are:

-They must be released during that Friday through Thursday period.
-They must be free.
-They must rule Katmandu's (that's me) face.
-They must be audio podcasts

This week's review covers the week of Friday, August 13th through Thursday, August 19th.


Coming in at Number Two:

BS Report. Release Date 8/18 A wonderful podcast primarily due to some uncomfortable that come when Bill interviews one of his childhood heroes John Hannah. The former Patriot hides none of his old school sensibilities. His bitterness towards the current NFL provides the best entertainment. Simmons seems a little let down with Hannah. We weren't the only ones who noticed. The second interviewee, announcer of the Jimmy Kimmel Show and Singer of the Mighty Mighty Bosstones-Dicky Barrett, instantly notices Bill Simmons' almost sad tone. Barrett brings him out of the funk with a great story of why he dislikes Kobe Bryant. Although after listening we are sure Kobe Bryant's only comment on the story would be, "Psssssshhhhh, whatever." You'll understand after you listen HERE.

Coming in at Number One:

The Dan Lebatard Show with Stugotz. Monday August 16th, Second half of the show. Release Date 8-17. Lebatard's show offers a unique brand of sports radio- self deprecating humor. Three guests riddle this podcast. The first being Billy Corben, director of ESPN 30 for 30 movie "The U". It is interesting to hear that Alabama had the second strongest viewership of "The U" when it premiered. Find out why and find out what made them so upset in this segment. Then Dan, Co-host Stugotz and Producer Hoch welcome recently weed busted NBA'er Udonis Haslem's Sister's Uncle's Brother's Neighbor's Handyman's Lawyer to the show...(just kidding- He is just Udonis Haslem's lawyer). As Charlie from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia would say, "He spoke lawerly to us". This interview led to some very funny post interview comments regarding Pat Riley and how things would have shaken out if Riley was in that car with Haslem. The hour ends with show regular ESPN Baseball anaylist Tim Kirkjian. Kirkjian was not himself due to his dog dying. This was the best part of the show. Instead of consoling their friend, Dan and the gang simply ran him off. They wanted none of his depressing mood on their show! Very funny, a must-download. So get downloading and listening HERE.

Also of note:

-A very heavy sports themed week here at Podcast Review with Katmandu. So if you are not into sports, then grow a pair. Just joking, but for those non-sports crazed freaks we must say you will still be entertained by Bill Simmons and Dan Lebatard. Their shows are equal parts sports and pop culture. So give em a shot.

-This American Life was a repeat this week and we don't like to list repeats in our Tops. This was a great episode, however, titled Superheroes. A pre-PC guy and pre-Daily Show John Hodgmen leads the way finding out from people would you rather be able to fly or would you rather be invisible? Good stuff in case you missed it several years ago.

Visit us every friday for a new Podcast Review with Katmandu

Please send thoughts, suggestions, hate mail and/or love mail to

Past Editions of Podcast Review with Katmandu:

Also do not forget to enter our contest. Find out how-HERE.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Atlanta's got something pretty cool going on in the Street Art World.

The ATL has got a pretty cool thing going on as we speak. An actual street art show. It is called Living Walls, the City Speaks. More information can be found HERE. Some work has reportedly been "added to" as was reported by the excellent art critic Jessica Blankenship. Find out what exactly happened HERE.

Our very own Short Attention What? in House Photography Team- Donkey Farmers- were at the opening to take some pics for you to enjoy. So, please do enjoy. Get to it. Get your enjoyment on. NOW DAMNIT! YOU BETTER MOTHA FUCKIN ENJOY THIS SHIT OR ELSE!!!! just kidding. No pressure. Just relax and enjoy.


Do you like it?

Are you enjoying it yet?


Tell us! Tell us Damnit! TELL US NOW!!!! (

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Sports Editor B Smith reports

This Shirt sums up Da U. However, resident SAW? cane fan (Adam lil Langer) wanted to let everyone know that he sums it up as: GREATEST SHIRT EVER!

see some of our other college football stories below:

Urban Files 1
Urban Files 2
Friar Tebow
Future NFL Rookies of the Year in Gainseville?
Was Bobby Bowden on the take?

Monday, August 16, 2010

The difference between San Francisco and New York as told by Banksy art left in the Cities.

It is obvious New York City and San Francisco have different personalities. Maybe none too obvious as to what we see here.





Thanks to and for some of the pics.

We have other Banksy related posts...Please do check them out. Here are some links:

Sunday, August 15, 2010

SAW's traffic department reports

I-85 is swamped. The large Hadron Collider is moving to Georgia.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

the Urban Files 2

As many of you know, we have heavy FSU representation here at the ole Short Attention What? Sports Department. Therefore, in an effort to keep things fair, we have allowed our token Gator Alum to spout his gator news (nonsense) in a weekly report called the Urban Files:

-Kind of quiet on gathering information as Coach Meyer has closed practices like our young D-Lineman will close any holes. However, we still have sources willing to give us some nuggets. But before we get into all that, we would like to speak on the Emmitt Smith Hall of Fame speech. There is a lot of outcry from gator nation regarding the apparent snubbing of a Florida Gator mention in his speech. Emmitt went out of his way to mention his error on the broadcast of the Hall of Fame game the following night. The guy simply forgot. He was not using notes and he did not do that on purpose. So, Emmitt is good by us.

-Brantley continues to impress developing a strong relationship with our speedy receivers. One set back though is freshman Chris Dunkley pulled a hammy and our wise coaches are not rushing him back. -Look for Freshman Defensive End Lynden Trail to make an immediate impact. Trail brings a toughness and character that can only be had by growing up in the mean streets of Miami. According to sources Trail is like 7 foot 9 and will block a field goal every other game. I kid of course, but dude is tall as hell and athletic as can be. He is only part of that freshman d line class that is unmatched in the history of the game.

-Demps is even faster than last year. The thing about Demps though, is his toughness. One player we spoke to said Demps caught a pass and trucked Jon Bostic and kept on running.
-Patchan got hurt again.
-Meyer is a class act in going to honor Emmitt at the Hall.
-Oh, yeah, and the canes think they are back. Ha ha ha.

Editor's (FSU's) Note:

Just a couple things. Emmitt reportedly hired a speech coach and practiced his speech to the point of memorization. The snub had to be on purpose. Only other thing is about Lynden Trail. Perhaps, Trail is good people. But do not forget that it was this photo of Trail holding up gang signs that shocked the recruiting world a few months ago:

The same type of images surfaced while Nu'keese Richardson was being recruited and we all remember how that turned out: